I am a parent in a minivan driving to pick up the kids—no, that isn’t true. I am the parent in the passenger seat telling my significant other where to go. He likes to make jokes as we drive, but I don’t have the heart to tell him he really isn’t very funny. He tries too hard to keep up with his nickname, but he cares for the kids in his own way, even if I do all the heavy lifting. Nevertheless, we have a plan, a task, a set course: we must pick up our kids.
But we have many, eleven to be exact, with another due in early April. We have some names floating around but I won’t say just yet; that is just a digression anyway. As if just having eleven kids wasn’t enough work, they have to do their own activities on what seems like opposite ends of the galaxy. Driving to pick them up is becoming increasingly fatiguing. If I have to do this why can’t I have a large, open field to go through? Why must I stick to this narrow, enclosed road? I suppose no one can have everything.
I can’t even have my old passions anymore. I’ve almost done away with them entirely. Who could possibly enjoy collecting things when you have to keep track of it all and your kids, right? Well, maybe I could. There was something pleasant about having so many possessions, even if I had to figure out what to keep and sell the rest to get by. It sure as hell beats having to do arduous work in a mine.
Although, with these kids telling me to pull over so often, maybe I couldn’t deal with it. I have yet to pick everyone up but already they are wanting me to go off on these tangential stops with them. It is like they don’t want me to get all the way home; they want to just distract me from moving forward. I can understand when one of them wants me to do something but when they all do? You would think the older kids would be understanding but they are the same way.
Anyway, I really should get back to directing him where to go. I still have two kids to pick up and I know all the others will want to make their own stops too. I may make this trip out to be a narrow drag but I guess it isn’t that all bad. I have some beautiful scenery to look at and great music to listen to. Even if the kids make my life more restrictive and they act a little annoying, sometimes they say or do things that really make me think. I like that. I will save my final thoughts until I get all the way home.
-Shepard
{ 21 comments… read them below or add one }
Thats not the pains of being a Parent so much as the pain of having ELEVEN children to tend to…
Besides.. Shepard’s married to Liara..she wont have kids!
I am confused.
technically, Liara is a transvestite. And her male organs works :/
@P33PS
LIES..LIES AND SLANDER.. no proof, only speculation on how Asari’s reproduce
hehe wow, that is a rather unique, cryptic way of explaining Mass Effect 2
Im not even sure as to how much this is a legit post in reference to ME or ME2.. im thinking more Glitch or the Hax.
But for now, we play the waiting game..
WAITASECOND…………
*LIGHTBULB* that was probably the biggest epiphany of my life..
This would have to be ME2.
There weren’t nearly this many crew members in ME1.
I hope Shepard finished Dragon Age. It’s a better game, but she wouldn’t know it if she stopped playing before the endgame.
So… who the heck wrote this? Brad?
Kind of amazing how abstract and sporadic it is to anything Mass Effect, but somehow…..it all makes sense, consider me stupified.
This is a reference to ME3: “He likes to make jokes as we drive, but I don’t have the heart to tell him he really isn’t very funny. He tries too hard to keep up with his nickname” obviously joker, which was said to be available in ME3.
I think its supposed to be talking about ME2, where you have to rescue all the characters and complete their loyalty missions. The characters are the “kids” and the “stops” are their loyalty missions.
For those of you who are confused by the metaphor.
Is this Brad’s response to the debate I accidentally started a couple nights ago when I suggested ME2 was underrated?
I’m sticking to that. I’m amazed at how many people bitch about it.
another due in april, that new DLC chick =p i wonder who wrote this, either brad or joseph. mabye nolan? not nick.
It miiiiight have been me.
That is some good stuff school. Love how you compared it to parenting. Great work writing all that.
School you freakin blew my mind dude, seriously, incredibly written!
I don’t get it.
Every Bioware game is a parenting class!
Justttt kidding.
Brads comment leads me to believe Nick Henderson or Carlos wrote this.either way..that was the most brilliant post ive ever read!